Roberta M. Helming: Changing lifestyle is hard work, rewarding
By ROBERTA M. HELMING
For the Norwich Bulletin
Posted Dec 29, 2010 @ 11:50 PM
Last update Dec 30, 2010 @ 01:01 AM
It’s that time of year again to make those New Year’s resolutions, and again this year, resolving that this time you really mean it.
Among the most popular resolutions are weight loss and exercise — lofty goals but too often never brought to fruition. I think people are sincere in making the pledge, but it is hard work.
For starters, “diet” is a four-letter word that means “long-term commitment.” We generally like more instant gratification for our efforts.
Miracle or fad diets, losing 20 pounds in 20 days by eating grapefruits all day or taking diet pills can be unhealthy and rarely sustain weight loss.
In 2007, I began a weight loss program at Miriam Hospital in Providence, a weekly commitment with a group led by a psychologist. We learned to control eating with proper and healthy portions. We met regularly with an exercise physiologist learning about exercising based on individual levels of fitness, mobility and health concerns.
It gave me a better understanding of healthy eating and the importance of exercise. That understanding helped me keep the weight off for more than a year. But, when I was no longer involved in the program, and personal difficulties arose, I sought out “comfort” food and gained a lot of my weight back.
I haven’t given up, still determined to take what I’ve learned and start over.
Weight loss and maintenance is a lifelong process, a lifestyle change. Eating healthy and using portion control is difficult. A treat on occasion isn’t forbidden, it’s a good thing that helps you avoid feelings of being deprived and discouraged.
Build up
My approach to exercise is to start with two minutes at a time and build from there. It’s a habit that needs to take root and then be built upon. Any incidental walking, such as grocery shopping or going to the mall, is also exercise. You need to think in those terms. Parking farther away from the stores helps, as does avoiding elevators.
Make it fun. On my treadmill, I’m “walking” around the United States. I’ve already “walked” to Minneapolis on my way to Astoria, Ore., a beautiful coastal town.
I wish everyone who has a goal to lose weight in the new year the best. Be kind to yourself. If you falter, forgive yourself, but don’t give up. Pick yourself up and give it another try.
It’s a difficult path, but one where successes feel good. Relapses aren’t collapses, and regardless, love yourself for trying.
And before starting, consult your physician to make sure it’s something you can do.
Roberta M. Helming is a freelance writer from Ledyard and regular contributor to the Norwich Bulletin. She can be reached at RMHelming@aol.com.
Copyright 2010 Norwich Bulletin. Some rights reserved
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Thursday, December 23, 2010
Moving on is natural, but keep memories
Moving on is natural, but keep memories
By By ROBERTA M. HELMING
Norwich Bulletin
Posted Dec 17, 2010 @ 12:09 AM
Many in Eastern Connecticut are facing a difficult challenge that began last week with the loss of four young lives in an automobile accident in Griswold. This unimaginable loss is tough on the community, and beyond devastating for the families and friends of these young people.
Right now, the families are surrounded by love and care from the outpouring of community support. That will soon dissipate as we all begin the process of moving on. But for the families, there are years of grief still ahead — birthdays, anniversaries of special times and events, such as next year’s high school graduation that they won’t be attending.
Keeping the emotional support going by continuing to let those grieving know that their loss is still in the hearts and minds of the community — a simple reminder that their children aren’t forgotten — is important.
That is something families members will embrace as they, too, painfully attempt to move on with their lives.
It won’t be easy getting past the void created from such a quick tragedy. The unworn clothes, the empty beds, the empty birthdays and holidays filled with traditions that included these teens that will be no more.
If you knew these young people, take something that you remember them for and keep it alive in your heart and mind.
Those who feel compelled to do more might consider planting a tree or establishing a scholarship in their names, perhaps in an area that was a special interest to them.
Seek support
For their friends, finding comfort won’t be easy either. They need to talk and express how they feel. I hope they seek out a school counselor, clergyman or another friend. There is no shame expressing the hurt. That is part of life, and it enables us to participate in activities organized in their memory. That, too, is part of the healing process.
I’ve searched my mind and heart to understand the deaths of the four teens in Griswold. It truly doesn’t make sense to have them taken from us far too soon. I send my thoughts, heartfelt sympathy and prayers to all affected by this terrible tragedy.
Dillon Clifford, Sativa Cornell, Steven Szklarz and John Clapper touched hearts. Their presence on Earth had meaning. Grieve their loss for a time, but then celebrate their lives through living yours.
That isn’t forgetting, but rather remembering how to live without them in person but forever in the heart — a place where they will live on.
Roberta M. Helming is a freelance writer from Ledyard and regular contributor to the Norwich Bulletin. She can be reached at RMHelming@aol.com
Copyright 2010 Norwich Bulletin. Some rights reserved
By By ROBERTA M. HELMING
Norwich Bulletin
Posted Dec 17, 2010 @ 12:09 AM
Many in Eastern Connecticut are facing a difficult challenge that began last week with the loss of four young lives in an automobile accident in Griswold. This unimaginable loss is tough on the community, and beyond devastating for the families and friends of these young people.
Right now, the families are surrounded by love and care from the outpouring of community support. That will soon dissipate as we all begin the process of moving on. But for the families, there are years of grief still ahead — birthdays, anniversaries of special times and events, such as next year’s high school graduation that they won’t be attending.
Keeping the emotional support going by continuing to let those grieving know that their loss is still in the hearts and minds of the community — a simple reminder that their children aren’t forgotten — is important.
That is something families members will embrace as they, too, painfully attempt to move on with their lives.
It won’t be easy getting past the void created from such a quick tragedy. The unworn clothes, the empty beds, the empty birthdays and holidays filled with traditions that included these teens that will be no more.
If you knew these young people, take something that you remember them for and keep it alive in your heart and mind.
Those who feel compelled to do more might consider planting a tree or establishing a scholarship in their names, perhaps in an area that was a special interest to them.
Seek support
For their friends, finding comfort won’t be easy either. They need to talk and express how they feel. I hope they seek out a school counselor, clergyman or another friend. There is no shame expressing the hurt. That is part of life, and it enables us to participate in activities organized in their memory. That, too, is part of the healing process.
I’ve searched my mind and heart to understand the deaths of the four teens in Griswold. It truly doesn’t make sense to have them taken from us far too soon. I send my thoughts, heartfelt sympathy and prayers to all affected by this terrible tragedy.
Dillon Clifford, Sativa Cornell, Steven Szklarz and John Clapper touched hearts. Their presence on Earth had meaning. Grieve their loss for a time, but then celebrate their lives through living yours.
That isn’t forgetting, but rather remembering how to live without them in person but forever in the heart — a place where they will live on.
Roberta M. Helming is a freelance writer from Ledyard and regular contributor to the Norwich Bulletin. She can be reached at RMHelming@aol.com
Copyright 2010 Norwich Bulletin. Some rights reserved
Roberta M. Helming: Moving on is natural, but keep memories
Moving on is natural, but keep memories
By By ROBERTA M. HELMING
Norwich Bulletin
Posted Dec 17, 2010 @ 12:09 AM
Many in Eastern Connecticut are facing a difficult challenge that began last week with the loss of four young lives in an automobile accident in Griswold. This unimaginable loss is tough on the community, and beyond devastating for the families and friends of these young people.
Right now, the families are surrounded by love and care from the outpouring of community support. That will soon dissipate as we all begin the process of moving on. But for the families, there are years of grief still ahead — birthdays, anniversaries of special times and events, such as next year’s high school graduation that they won’t be attending.
Keeping the emotional support going by continuing to let those grieving know that their loss is still in the hearts and minds of the community — a simple reminder that their children aren’t forgotten — is important.
That is something families members will embrace as they, too, painfully attempt to move on with their lives.
It won’t be easy getting past the void created from such a quick tragedy. The unworn clothes, the empty beds, the empty birthdays and holidays filled with traditions that included these teens that will be no more.
If you knew these young people, take something that you remember them for and keep it alive in your heart and mind.
Those who feel compelled to do more might consider planting a tree or establishing a scholarship in their names, perhaps in an area that was a special interest to them.
Seek support
For their friends, finding comfort won’t be easy either. They need to talk and express how they feel. I hope they seek out a school counselor, clergyman or another friend. There is no shame expressing the hurt. That is part of life, and it enables us to participate in activities organized in their memory. That, too, is part of the healing process.
I’ve searched my mind and heart to understand the deaths of the four teens in Griswold. It truly doesn’t make sense to have them taken from us far too soon. I send my thoughts, heartfelt sympathy and prayers to all affected by this terrible tragedy.
Dillon Clifford, Sativa Cornell, Steven Szklarz and John Clapper touched hearts. Their presence on Earth had meaning. Grieve their loss for a time, but then celebrate their lives through living yours.
That isn’t forgetting, but rather remembering how to live without them in person but forever in the heart — a place where they will live on.
Roberta M. Helming is a freelance writer from Ledyard and regular contributor to the Norwich Bulletin. She can be reached at RMHelming@aol.com
Copyright 2010 Norwich Bulletin. Some rights reserved
By By ROBERTA M. HELMING
Norwich Bulletin
Posted Dec 17, 2010 @ 12:09 AM
Many in Eastern Connecticut are facing a difficult challenge that began last week with the loss of four young lives in an automobile accident in Griswold. This unimaginable loss is tough on the community, and beyond devastating for the families and friends of these young people.
Right now, the families are surrounded by love and care from the outpouring of community support. That will soon dissipate as we all begin the process of moving on. But for the families, there are years of grief still ahead — birthdays, anniversaries of special times and events, such as next year’s high school graduation that they won’t be attending.
Keeping the emotional support going by continuing to let those grieving know that their loss is still in the hearts and minds of the community — a simple reminder that their children aren’t forgotten — is important.
That is something families members will embrace as they, too, painfully attempt to move on with their lives.
It won’t be easy getting past the void created from such a quick tragedy. The unworn clothes, the empty beds, the empty birthdays and holidays filled with traditions that included these teens that will be no more.
If you knew these young people, take something that you remember them for and keep it alive in your heart and mind.
Those who feel compelled to do more might consider planting a tree or establishing a scholarship in their names, perhaps in an area that was a special interest to them.
Seek support
For their friends, finding comfort won’t be easy either. They need to talk and express how they feel. I hope they seek out a school counselor, clergyman or another friend. There is no shame expressing the hurt. That is part of life, and it enables us to participate in activities organized in their memory. That, too, is part of the healing process.
I’ve searched my mind and heart to understand the deaths of the four teens in Griswold. It truly doesn’t make sense to have them taken from us far too soon. I send my thoughts, heartfelt sympathy and prayers to all affected by this terrible tragedy.
Dillon Clifford, Sativa Cornell, Steven Szklarz and John Clapper touched hearts. Their presence on Earth had meaning. Grieve their loss for a time, but then celebrate their lives through living yours.
That isn’t forgetting, but rather remembering how to live without them in person but forever in the heart — a place where they will live on.
Roberta M. Helming is a freelance writer from Ledyard and regular contributor to the Norwich Bulletin. She can be reached at RMHelming@aol.com
Copyright 2010 Norwich Bulletin. Some rights reserved
Roberta M. Helming: Moving on is natural, but keep memories
Moving on is natural, but keep memories
By By ROBERTA M. HELMING
Norwich Bulletin
Posted Dec 17, 2010 @ 12:09 AM
Many in Eastern Connecticut are facing a difficult challenge that began last week with the loss of four young lives in an automobile accident in Griswold. This unimaginable loss is tough on the community, and beyond devastating for the families and friends of these young people.
Right now, the families are surrounded by love and care from the outpouring of community support. That will soon dissipate as we all begin the process of moving on. But for the families, there are years of grief still ahead — birthdays, anniversaries of special times and events, such as next year’s high school graduation that they won’t be attending.
Keeping the emotional support going by continuing to let those grieving know that their loss is still in the hearts and minds of the community — a simple reminder that their children aren’t forgotten — is important.
That is something families members will embrace as they, too, painfully attempt to move on with their lives.
It won’t be easy getting past the void created from such a quick tragedy. The unworn clothes, the empty beds, the empty birthdays and holidays filled with traditions that included these teens that will be no more.
If you knew these young people, take something that you remember them for and keep it alive in your heart and mind.
Those who feel compelled to do more might consider planting a tree or establishing a scholarship in their names, perhaps in an area that was a special interest to them.
Seek support
For their friends, finding comfort won’t be easy either. They need to talk and express how they feel. I hope they seek out a school counselor, clergyman or another friend. There is no shame expressing the hurt. That is part of life, and it enables us to participate in activities organized in their memory. That, too, is part of the healing process.
I’ve searched my mind and heart to understand the deaths of the four teens in Griswold. It truly doesn’t make sense to have them taken from us far too soon. I send my thoughts, heartfelt sympathy and prayers to all affected by this terrible tragedy.
Dillon Clifford, Sativa Cornell, Steven Szklarz and John Clapper touched hearts. Their presence on Earth had meaning. Grieve their loss for a time, but then celebrate their lives through living yours.
That isn’t forgetting, but rather remembering how to live without them in person but forever in the heart — a place where they will live on.
Roberta M. Helming is a freelance writer from Ledyard and regular contributor to the Norwich Bulletin. She can be reached at RMHelming@aol.com
Copyright 2010 Norwich Bulletin. Some rights reserved
By By ROBERTA M. HELMING
Norwich Bulletin
Posted Dec 17, 2010 @ 12:09 AM
Many in Eastern Connecticut are facing a difficult challenge that began last week with the loss of four young lives in an automobile accident in Griswold. This unimaginable loss is tough on the community, and beyond devastating for the families and friends of these young people.
Right now, the families are surrounded by love and care from the outpouring of community support. That will soon dissipate as we all begin the process of moving on. But for the families, there are years of grief still ahead — birthdays, anniversaries of special times and events, such as next year’s high school graduation that they won’t be attending.
Keeping the emotional support going by continuing to let those grieving know that their loss is still in the hearts and minds of the community — a simple reminder that their children aren’t forgotten — is important.
That is something families members will embrace as they, too, painfully attempt to move on with their lives.
It won’t be easy getting past the void created from such a quick tragedy. The unworn clothes, the empty beds, the empty birthdays and holidays filled with traditions that included these teens that will be no more.
If you knew these young people, take something that you remember them for and keep it alive in your heart and mind.
Those who feel compelled to do more might consider planting a tree or establishing a scholarship in their names, perhaps in an area that was a special interest to them.
Seek support
For their friends, finding comfort won’t be easy either. They need to talk and express how they feel. I hope they seek out a school counselor, clergyman or another friend. There is no shame expressing the hurt. That is part of life, and it enables us to participate in activities organized in their memory. That, too, is part of the healing process.
I’ve searched my mind and heart to understand the deaths of the four teens in Griswold. It truly doesn’t make sense to have them taken from us far too soon. I send my thoughts, heartfelt sympathy and prayers to all affected by this terrible tragedy.
Dillon Clifford, Sativa Cornell, Steven Szklarz and John Clapper touched hearts. Their presence on Earth had meaning. Grieve their loss for a time, but then celebrate their lives through living yours.
That isn’t forgetting, but rather remembering how to live without them in person but forever in the heart — a place where they will live on.
Roberta M. Helming is a freelance writer from Ledyard and regular contributor to the Norwich Bulletin. She can be reached at RMHelming@aol.com
Copyright 2010 Norwich Bulletin. Some rights reserved
Roberta M. Helming: Treasured memories are gifts of season
Roberta M. Helming: Treasured memories are gifts of season
By ROBERTA M. HELMING
Norwich Bulletin
Posted Dec 22, 2010 @ 11:46 PM
During the holidays — Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa — families and friends gather to celebrate. Those gatherings are filled with conversations, laughter and reminiscing, creating new and lasting memories to be forever part of future celebrations.
In 1995, my husband and I visited friends in northern Scotland. They picked us up at the airport at Inverness, and after a 125-mile drive on narrow, winding roads in the middle of nowhere, we arrived at their home, tired but excited to be with them.
My friend Penny, her husband, five children, two dogs and a cat lived in a three-bedroom flat. We knew we’d have a nice Christmas; we didn’t know just how cozy. We had, however, made reservations for our own accommodations.
Two days after arriving, northern Scotland was hit with the worst snowstorm in 100 years. With no food in the cottage we rented, we stayed with our friends throughout the day and after supper returned to the cottage.
The next day, Christmas Eve, still snowing and no power — or heat — we were forced to gather some clothing and sleep at our friends’ home. Yes, four adults, five kids, two dogs and a cat — all in a three-bedroom flat. Quite snug indeed.
That night, Penny’s husband, Billy, buried the uncooked turkey outside so it wouldn’t spoil. Christmas morning we awoke to more snow — and still no lights. But we had an enjoyable Christmas exchanging gifts, stories and laughter. With no electricity, Billy went to his “box of parts” and found a small propane oven. With a few repairs, we ended up with a lovely Christmas dinner.
Respite from snow
When the snow temporarily stopped and roads cleared somewhat, we decided we needed to return to Inverness for our flight home. Pushing our way through the snow to our cottage, we retrieved our belongings.
We made reservations to stay over until our flight home. Our reservations took us to the castle where Prince Charles had stayed. The staff kindly found us more “appropriate” accommodations at a small hotel, where the owner gave us the front door key.
We haven’t been back to visit our friends and probably never will. But we each have wonderful memories of Christmas 1995 that bring smiles to our faces and warmth in our hearts.
To me, that’s the real meaning of the season. I don’t remember the gifts that were exchanged, but I do remember the experience — a gift that can’t be bought.
Roberta M. Helming is a freelance writer from Ledyard and regular contributor to the Norwich Bulletin. She can be reached at RMHelming@aol.com.
Copyright 2010 Norwich Bulletin. Some rights reserved
By ROBERTA M. HELMING
Norwich Bulletin
Posted Dec 22, 2010 @ 11:46 PM
During the holidays — Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa — families and friends gather to celebrate. Those gatherings are filled with conversations, laughter and reminiscing, creating new and lasting memories to be forever part of future celebrations.
In 1995, my husband and I visited friends in northern Scotland. They picked us up at the airport at Inverness, and after a 125-mile drive on narrow, winding roads in the middle of nowhere, we arrived at their home, tired but excited to be with them.
My friend Penny, her husband, five children, two dogs and a cat lived in a three-bedroom flat. We knew we’d have a nice Christmas; we didn’t know just how cozy. We had, however, made reservations for our own accommodations.
Two days after arriving, northern Scotland was hit with the worst snowstorm in 100 years. With no food in the cottage we rented, we stayed with our friends throughout the day and after supper returned to the cottage.
The next day, Christmas Eve, still snowing and no power — or heat — we were forced to gather some clothing and sleep at our friends’ home. Yes, four adults, five kids, two dogs and a cat — all in a three-bedroom flat. Quite snug indeed.
That night, Penny’s husband, Billy, buried the uncooked turkey outside so it wouldn’t spoil. Christmas morning we awoke to more snow — and still no lights. But we had an enjoyable Christmas exchanging gifts, stories and laughter. With no electricity, Billy went to his “box of parts” and found a small propane oven. With a few repairs, we ended up with a lovely Christmas dinner.
Respite from snow
When the snow temporarily stopped and roads cleared somewhat, we decided we needed to return to Inverness for our flight home. Pushing our way through the snow to our cottage, we retrieved our belongings.
We made reservations to stay over until our flight home. Our reservations took us to the castle where Prince Charles had stayed. The staff kindly found us more “appropriate” accommodations at a small hotel, where the owner gave us the front door key.
We haven’t been back to visit our friends and probably never will. But we each have wonderful memories of Christmas 1995 that bring smiles to our faces and warmth in our hearts.
To me, that’s the real meaning of the season. I don’t remember the gifts that were exchanged, but I do remember the experience — a gift that can’t be bought.
Roberta M. Helming is a freelance writer from Ledyard and regular contributor to the Norwich Bulletin. She can be reached at RMHelming@aol.com.
Copyright 2010 Norwich Bulletin. Some rights reserved
Sunday, December 19, 2010
Roberta M. Helming: Moving on is natural, but keep memories
Roberta M. Helming: Moving on is natural, but keep memories: "Moving on is natural, but keep memories By By ROBERTA M. HELMING Norwich Bulletin Posted Dec 17, 2010 @ 12:09 AM Many in Eastern Connec..."
Moving on is natural, but keep memories
Moving on is natural, but keep memories
By By ROBERTA M. HELMING
Norwich Bulletin
Posted Dec 17, 2010 @ 12:09 AM
Many in Eastern Connecticut are facing a difficult challenge that began last week with the loss of four young lives in an automobile accident in Griswold. This unimaginable loss is tough on the community, and beyond devastating for the families and friends of these young people.
Right now, the families are surrounded by love and care from the outpouring of community support. That will soon dissipate as we all begin the process of moving on. But for the families, there are years of grief still ahead — birthdays, anniversaries of special times and events, such as next year’s high school graduation that they won’t be attending.
Keeping the emotional support going by continuing to let those grieving know that their loss is still in the hearts and minds of the community — a simple reminder that their children aren’t forgotten — is important.
That is something families members will embrace as they, too, painfully attempt to move on with their lives.
It won’t be easy getting past the void created from such a quick tragedy. The unworn clothes, the empty beds, the empty birthdays and holidays filled with traditions that included these teens that will be no more.
If you knew these young people, take something that you remember them for and keep it alive in your heart and mind.
Those who feel compelled to do more might consider planting a tree or establishing a scholarship in their names, perhaps in an area that was a special interest to them.
Seek support
For their friends, finding comfort won’t be easy either. They need to talk and express how they feel. I hope they seek out a school counselor, clergyman or another friend. There is no shame expressing the hurt. That is part of life, and it enables us to participate in activities organized in their memory. That, too, is part of the healing process.
I’ve searched my mind and heart to understand the deaths of the four teens in Griswold. It truly doesn’t make sense to have them taken from us far too soon. I send my thoughts, heartfelt sympathy and prayers to all affected by this terrible tragedy.
Dillon Clifford, Sativa Cornell, Steven Szklarz and John Clapper touched hearts. Their presence on Earth had meaning. Grieve their loss for a time, but then celebrate their lives through living yours.
That isn’t forgetting, but rather remembering how to live without them in person but forever in the heart — a place where they will live on.
Roberta M. Helming is a freelance writer from Ledyard and regular contributor to the Norwich Bulletin. She can be reached at RMHelming@aol.com
Copyright 2010 Norwich Bulletin. Some rights reserved
By By ROBERTA M. HELMING
Norwich Bulletin
Posted Dec 17, 2010 @ 12:09 AM
Many in Eastern Connecticut are facing a difficult challenge that began last week with the loss of four young lives in an automobile accident in Griswold. This unimaginable loss is tough on the community, and beyond devastating for the families and friends of these young people.
Right now, the families are surrounded by love and care from the outpouring of community support. That will soon dissipate as we all begin the process of moving on. But for the families, there are years of grief still ahead — birthdays, anniversaries of special times and events, such as next year’s high school graduation that they won’t be attending.
Keeping the emotional support going by continuing to let those grieving know that their loss is still in the hearts and minds of the community — a simple reminder that their children aren’t forgotten — is important.
That is something families members will embrace as they, too, painfully attempt to move on with their lives.
It won’t be easy getting past the void created from such a quick tragedy. The unworn clothes, the empty beds, the empty birthdays and holidays filled with traditions that included these teens that will be no more.
If you knew these young people, take something that you remember them for and keep it alive in your heart and mind.
Those who feel compelled to do more might consider planting a tree or establishing a scholarship in their names, perhaps in an area that was a special interest to them.
Seek support
For their friends, finding comfort won’t be easy either. They need to talk and express how they feel. I hope they seek out a school counselor, clergyman or another friend. There is no shame expressing the hurt. That is part of life, and it enables us to participate in activities organized in their memory. That, too, is part of the healing process.
I’ve searched my mind and heart to understand the deaths of the four teens in Griswold. It truly doesn’t make sense to have them taken from us far too soon. I send my thoughts, heartfelt sympathy and prayers to all affected by this terrible tragedy.
Dillon Clifford, Sativa Cornell, Steven Szklarz and John Clapper touched hearts. Their presence on Earth had meaning. Grieve their loss for a time, but then celebrate their lives through living yours.
That isn’t forgetting, but rather remembering how to live without them in person but forever in the heart — a place where they will live on.
Roberta M. Helming is a freelance writer from Ledyard and regular contributor to the Norwich Bulletin. She can be reached at RMHelming@aol.com
Copyright 2010 Norwich Bulletin. Some rights reserved
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Roberta M. Helming: Racist rant is pointless expression of ignorance
Roberta M. Helming: Racist rant is pointless expression of ignorance
By ROBERTA M. HELMING
For the Norwich Bulletin
Posted Nov 25, 2010 @ 11:00 PM
I’m bothered by an online story and video of a woman in Hingham, Mass., who went into a tirade, hurling racial epithets at, and committing an assault on, a black postman.
One word in particular she used was disturbing, and her degrading remarks concerning his character were based not solely on him, but an entire race. It was hurtful.
Equally frustrating is this woman’s only possible crime is the minor physical assault. By itself, the verbal racial abuse against this man — and blacks in general — unfortunately is not a crime.
It makes you wonder why there is this kind of hate based solely on race. Regardless of race, we are still humans. We love our children and mourn the loss of loved ones. We laugh, cry, hurt, etc. Where is the difference?
Hatred of races is sadly present in all walks of life. Anyone is capable of racist behavior. It knows no socioeconomic boundaries and excludes no race.
Racist remarks may stem from hatred, hurt, low self-esteem, undereducation or overeducation. All kinds of minds that are somehow broken, thoughtless.
Everyone occasionally becomes annoyed at other people, leading to name-calling, but it doesn’t have to be that way. As a society, we need to learn how to speak to one another without focusing on someone’s race, personality traits or physical features. We all have different personalities, likes and dislikes, strengths and weaknesses. It’s our upbringing that shapes us into who we become.
People from any socioeconomic class may or may not have a kind heart. They may or may not engage in destructive behavior. The one thing about all of us is that it’s not the race that makes the person; it’s the person who makes the race, including embracing their culture and enhancing it.
Too many people know little about their own culture. So how is it then possible to know that one’s culture is superior to that of another?
It’s easy to see people making uninformed decisions, leading to prejudicial remarks and behavior. A lack of knowledge breeds hate and discrimination.
We need each other, and we have proven time and time again that we are willing to help each other. The Sept. 11 attacks proved that race didn’t matter when it came time to help each other. Why is it that we need such disasters to confirm what we already know?
What is solved by an enraged woman using racial slurs against a postman and his race in general? Nothing. The video taken from the postman’s cell phone shows he was guilty of nothing except attempting to politely do his job.
Roberta M. Helming is a freelance writer from Ledyard and regular contributor to the Norwich Bulletin. She can be reached at RMHelming@aol.com
Copyright 2010 Norwich Bulletin. Some rights reserved
By ROBERTA M. HELMING
For the Norwich Bulletin
Posted Nov 25, 2010 @ 11:00 PM
I’m bothered by an online story and video of a woman in Hingham, Mass., who went into a tirade, hurling racial epithets at, and committing an assault on, a black postman.
One word in particular she used was disturbing, and her degrading remarks concerning his character were based not solely on him, but an entire race. It was hurtful.
Equally frustrating is this woman’s only possible crime is the minor physical assault. By itself, the verbal racial abuse against this man — and blacks in general — unfortunately is not a crime.
It makes you wonder why there is this kind of hate based solely on race. Regardless of race, we are still humans. We love our children and mourn the loss of loved ones. We laugh, cry, hurt, etc. Where is the difference?
Hatred of races is sadly present in all walks of life. Anyone is capable of racist behavior. It knows no socioeconomic boundaries and excludes no race.
Racist remarks may stem from hatred, hurt, low self-esteem, undereducation or overeducation. All kinds of minds that are somehow broken, thoughtless.
Everyone occasionally becomes annoyed at other people, leading to name-calling, but it doesn’t have to be that way. As a society, we need to learn how to speak to one another without focusing on someone’s race, personality traits or physical features. We all have different personalities, likes and dislikes, strengths and weaknesses. It’s our upbringing that shapes us into who we become.
People from any socioeconomic class may or may not have a kind heart. They may or may not engage in destructive behavior. The one thing about all of us is that it’s not the race that makes the person; it’s the person who makes the race, including embracing their culture and enhancing it.
Too many people know little about their own culture. So how is it then possible to know that one’s culture is superior to that of another?
It’s easy to see people making uninformed decisions, leading to prejudicial remarks and behavior. A lack of knowledge breeds hate and discrimination.
We need each other, and we have proven time and time again that we are willing to help each other. The Sept. 11 attacks proved that race didn’t matter when it came time to help each other. Why is it that we need such disasters to confirm what we already know?
What is solved by an enraged woman using racial slurs against a postman and his race in general? Nothing. The video taken from the postman’s cell phone shows he was guilty of nothing except attempting to politely do his job.
Roberta M. Helming is a freelance writer from Ledyard and regular contributor to the Norwich Bulletin. She can be reached at RMHelming@aol.com
Copyright 2010 Norwich Bulletin. Some rights reserved
Roberta M. Helming: Bank robber proved she has chance for good life
Roberta M. Helming: Bank robber proved she has chance for good life
By ROBERTA M. HELMING
For the Norwich Bulletin
Posted Dec 14, 2010 @ 12:05 AM
Last update Dec 14, 2010 @ 12:20 AM
The Norwich Bulletin’s lead story Dec. 4 about Heather Brown’s sentencing on four counts of bank robbery in Connecticut — also facing similar charges in Massachusetts and Rhode Island — touched my heart.
Heather’s is a sad case.
In her teens, she was raped by a friend of a relative. She never sought help to understand the degradation she went through, eventually turning to a life of crime and risky behavior. At her sentencing, defense attorney James McKay called her smart and articulate, saying she could have possibly done well under different circumstances.
A former attorney, Lawrence W. Bates, described her as a nice person, not just a crack cocaine addict. He said she is very intelligent, a personable woman who had been an excellent baby sitter to his children. She’s gifted — someone who could have had anything she wanted in life.
So what happened?
Some point to her strong crack cocaine addiction, her denial and her need to be in the spotlight. On the outside, Heather looked like a drug addict and prostitute. But a woman robbing banks with no mask isn’t your typical bank robber. As Judge Patrick Clifford said, “This is about as loud a cry (for help) as you can get.”
Help eluded Heather, or maybe she eluded it. She was susceptible to being taken advantage of.
She started writing her autobiography during a previous prison sentence but never completed it. Once out of prison, she was approached by Mark Braunstein, a photographer and librarian at Connecticut College, to purchase the rights to her autobiography. On his website www.markbraunstein.org, his knowledge of Heather’s inability to make sound decisions is clear, but apparently that didn’t stop him from purchasing the rights for a mere $40, which he states Heather quickly used to purchase crack cocaine.
Heather now says she’s finally learned to love herself. It’s a relief to know she’s receiving help and is open to changing her behaviors. For under that larger-than-life crime spree is a woman who is — was — scared and hurt. Maybe, if not for being raped, she would have had a better life.
Hopefully, she’ll continue to receive help. She may not live in an ideal place, but if she works hard, she might find some quality of life — even in prison. And though she wasn’t emotionally healthy when committing her crimes, she needs to serve her prison time.
Heather’s apology at her sentencing was a major step forward — a glimpse, I think, of what’s really within her mind and heart.
Roberta M. Helming is a freelance writer from Ledyard and regular contributor to the Norwich Bulletin. She can be reached at RMHelming@aol.com.
Copyright 2010 Norwich Bulletin. Some rights reserved
By ROBERTA M. HELMING
For the Norwich Bulletin
Posted Dec 14, 2010 @ 12:05 AM
Last update Dec 14, 2010 @ 12:20 AM
The Norwich Bulletin’s lead story Dec. 4 about Heather Brown’s sentencing on four counts of bank robbery in Connecticut — also facing similar charges in Massachusetts and Rhode Island — touched my heart.
Heather’s is a sad case.
In her teens, she was raped by a friend of a relative. She never sought help to understand the degradation she went through, eventually turning to a life of crime and risky behavior. At her sentencing, defense attorney James McKay called her smart and articulate, saying she could have possibly done well under different circumstances.
A former attorney, Lawrence W. Bates, described her as a nice person, not just a crack cocaine addict. He said she is very intelligent, a personable woman who had been an excellent baby sitter to his children. She’s gifted — someone who could have had anything she wanted in life.
So what happened?
Some point to her strong crack cocaine addiction, her denial and her need to be in the spotlight. On the outside, Heather looked like a drug addict and prostitute. But a woman robbing banks with no mask isn’t your typical bank robber. As Judge Patrick Clifford said, “This is about as loud a cry (for help) as you can get.”
Help eluded Heather, or maybe she eluded it. She was susceptible to being taken advantage of.
She started writing her autobiography during a previous prison sentence but never completed it. Once out of prison, she was approached by Mark Braunstein, a photographer and librarian at Connecticut College, to purchase the rights to her autobiography. On his website www.markbraunstein.org, his knowledge of Heather’s inability to make sound decisions is clear, but apparently that didn’t stop him from purchasing the rights for a mere $40, which he states Heather quickly used to purchase crack cocaine.
Heather now says she’s finally learned to love herself. It’s a relief to know she’s receiving help and is open to changing her behaviors. For under that larger-than-life crime spree is a woman who is — was — scared and hurt. Maybe, if not for being raped, she would have had a better life.
Hopefully, she’ll continue to receive help. She may not live in an ideal place, but if she works hard, she might find some quality of life — even in prison. And though she wasn’t emotionally healthy when committing her crimes, she needs to serve her prison time.
Heather’s apology at her sentencing was a major step forward — a glimpse, I think, of what’s really within her mind and heart.
Roberta M. Helming is a freelance writer from Ledyard and regular contributor to the Norwich Bulletin. She can be reached at RMHelming@aol.com.
Copyright 2010 Norwich Bulletin. Some rights reserved
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)